Answer the following 3 questions to see how your Wedding Ceremony Fits.
Question 1
What is the most important thing about your wedding day?
(In your head, or on a piece of paper, RANK the following in order of importance,
1 being Most important, 5 being the Least important)
Your Wedding Ceremony
- having a ceremony that reflects your love
The Party (reception)
- having fun with friends and family after the ceremony
Connection
- your wedding is about gathering your loved ones
Having it look a certain way
- having the most beautiful flowers, dress, venue, etc
How your entire wedding day feels
- a day full of love you’ll remember with the rest of your life
Question 2
What excites you most about your wedding ceremony?
(In your head, or on a piece of paper, RANK the following in order of importance,
1 being Most important, 5 being the Least important)
Having my loved ones witness me marrying my love.
Making our union official.
Sharing how much I love my fiance with everyone there!
Going through the ritual of becoming married.
I’m not that excited about the wedding ceremony.
Question 3
What scares you the most about your wedding ceremony?
(In your head, or on a piece of paper, RANK the following in order of importance,
1 being Most important, 5 being the Least important)
Being in front of people.
Having to speak in public.
Worried that I won’t do it right.
That it will be boring and stuffy.
I’m not that scared about it.
ANSWERS
WHAT DID YOU RANK AS MOST IMPORTANT FOR YOUR WEDDING DAY?
Question 1
What is the most important thing about your wedding day?
(In your head, or on a piece of paper, RANK the following in order of importance,
1 being Most important, 5 being the Least important)
Of course, I’m hoping that you’ve ranked your Wedding Ceremony as the most important thing about your wedding day. …Because this is the part that I absolutely love AND because it is something that can be so special and life-affirming/changing. And I don’t want you to miss out!
And because really… without the ceremony, you’re just throwing a big party or some kind of gathering or family reunion.
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If your Wedding Ceremony is number 1, then we’re on the same page. And I can’t wait to introduce to all the creative ways I can make your ceremony something that feels magical and sacred and fun! Book a Free 30-minute no-obligation consultation with me today to talk more.
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If you ranked Connection as your number one, there are some really beautiful ways to build connection right into your ceremony, from Grounding and Gathering rituals, to rituals that involve your loved one or all of your guests, and pieces of vibrant and love filled storytelling that will have your guests on the edge of their seat and talking about your wedding ceremony for years to come.
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If you ranked How Your Entire Wedding Day Feels as your number 1, then making sure that your wedding ceremony fits in with the rest of your vision for your wedding day is important and something not to be overlooked.
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If you ranked How Everything Looks as your number 1, we disagree a bit. I’m WAY more interested in how your wedding ceremony is going to feel than how it looks. I want it to feel special and different from your everyday. And I am not convinced that having a particular dress or flower combination ALONE is going to do it for you.
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If you ranked the Party as number 1 or 2, I might not be the best fit for you. And you might be better off with a marriage commissioner. Especially if you’re just looking to get your wedding ceremony “over and done with”. Learn about what a marriage commissioner is.
What did you rank as the thing you’re most excited about for your wedding Ceremony?
Question 2
What excites you most about your wedding ceremony?
My hope is that you’re STOKED about your Wedding Ceremony. It truly is a momentous occasion and you will feel different afterward.
In terms of ceremonies, a Wedding Ceremony is a Rite of Passage. Before you are married you are one thing and afterward, you are something different. Like a coming of age ceremony, you start out as a child/boy/girl and become an adult/woman/man.
In a Wedding Ceremony, you start out as an individual, who enters the ceremony space to be transformed. With each ritual that takes place - the Asking, Your Vows, Exchanging Rings, etc. - you come one step closer to that change. And then when all the transitions are complete you are acknowledged and welcomed back to your community and loved ones anew as someone who is now a part of a union between two people - “I now pronounce you married!”.
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Being witnessed by your loved ones when you go through a rite of passage is a powerful ritual for everyone who goes through it. It makes you feel seen - both as you were and who you become through the ceremony. And feels exquisite to be welcomed anew by your friends and family when you are pronounced MARRIED!
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There’s something about the Wedding Ceremony and going through all the rituals and legal paperwork that makes your union to your beloved feel that much more real. You’ve committed yourself to this person in front of a crowd, declared your love publicly, and completed the rites of passage that have subtly and profoundly changed your life forever.
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No one knows your love like you do. And a wedding is a wonderful way to share the exquisite beauty of your partner with everyone else. All the small actions and words that make them dear to you that no one else really knows about. This is what the “Love Story” part of your ceremony is all about! Book a free 30-min no-obligation consultation with me to learn more :)
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Rituals hold power and deep cultural memory. When you exchange rings, you’re reaching into the collective energy of everyone else who has ever exchanged rings. And when you incorporate rituals from your shared cultural heritage and beliefs, you’re creating a direct connection to your ancestors. And mixing rituals from both of your cultural heritages is a delicious way to create a beautiful foundation for your marriage.
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That’s ok. It takes a good level of discernment to know this about yourself. Maybe take a look at why you’re not excited about it. Did you pick up on a bad example of a wedding ceremony from somewhere? Did you get a bad idea about wedding ceremonies from your family, or movies/tv? Or maybe the gender you identify with says you shouldn’t really care about it…?
What did you rank as the thing you’re most scared about for your wedding Ceremony?
Question 3
What scares you the most about your wedding ceremony?
We have a general assumption in our society that getting married is something that will feel good. And we don’t often talk about how this works. Because even though you want to get married, there may be parts of it that will really challenge you. The planning. The family dynamics. The unspoken assumptions. Worries about being too emotional. Standing up in front of people. Speaking in public. Etc.
I always tell my couples there are literally only 2 things that absolutely MUST happen in a wedding ceremony in order for it to be official and legal. EVERYTHING ELSE can be changed! And I will walk you through all of them until we’ve found the right fit for you.
Book a Free 30-minute no-obligation consultation with me today to learn what these 3 things are ;)
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Standing up in front of people takes gumption. And maybe it’s something you’ve always found uncomfortable. There are ways to create a wedding ceremony that lessens this pressure. When you book in to chat with me, please let me know about this and I can help you come up with a creative solution that works best for you.
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Speaking in public is tricky. And I’ve got a few really great options to still make your wedding ceremony meaningful and lovely without you having to hardly speak at all.
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I’ve got you! I send you all the steps and wedding script beforehand so you know exactly what to expect. And if you also book a rehearsal with me, then you’ll get to run through it all beforehand and get a feel for what exactly will happen. Also, remember, I’ll be there with you the whole time and will make sure nothing goes off the rails on my watch.
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Boring and stuffy weddings usually come from wedding ceremonies that are done by rote… That are not changed and customized to the folks getting married. I can absolutely help you spice up your ceremony so that it’s fun and freeing and feels exactly right for the two of you!
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Great. Let’s dive in then!
Curious to see if you and your fiancé are on the same page?
Get them to try on the 3 Question Wedding Ceremony Fit for themselves!
Ready to do this?
Let’s book a time to chat details in your Free 30 min No-Obligation Consultation